Hi, I'm Alex.
I like music. I like people. I like driving at night.
I love me some Roadside-Commanders. I love my other friends. I probably don't love you.
Why are you still reading? Go outside and be weird.
My mom and sister are off dropping off the dogs, since they can’t be left home while we’re gone, so I have these last few moments at home by myself.
I’d be lying I said I wasn’t sad and a bit emotional.
I’m not really sure what to say beyond that.
It’s been a wonderful number of years here, and although clearly I’ll be back and seeing all my closest friends a decent amount over the next few years, right now that’s not the greatest comfort.
I know once I get there I’ll be fine, I’ll get a little homesick at times, but for the most part I’ll adjust fairly easy, fairly quickly.
But for now, it just sucks.
I’m mostly packed, and it’s not even nine.
I guess this is goodbye tumblr and tumblr friends. This site was great for the past year or so, but I think I’m very much done with it.
You’ve seen a decent amount of highschool me, who I was, how I’ve changed, and my aspirations for tomorrow.
Thank you to you all who were with me
Along the way.
My mom and sister are off dropping off the dogs, since they can’t be left home while we’re gone, so I have these last few moments at home by myself.
I’d be lying I said I wasn’t sad and a bit emotional.
I’m not really sure what to say beyond that.
It’s been a wonderful number of years here, and although clearly I’ll be back and seeing all my closest friends a decent amount over the next few years, right now that’s not the greatest comfort.
I know once I get there I’ll be fine, I’ll get a little homesick at times, but for the most part I’ll adjust fairly easy, fairly quickly.
But for now, it just sucks.
I’m mostly packed, and it’s not even nine.
I guess this is goodbye tumblr and tumblr friends. This site was great for the past year or so, but I think I’m very much done with it.
You’ve seen a decent amount of highschool me, who I was, how I’ve changed, and my aspirations for tomorrow.
Thank you to you all who were with me
Along the way.
I just realized that between Sunday and monday, I have to be packed to live on my own for a few months, make sure I did everythin I was supposed to, and say goodbye to my dad, my extended family, and a fair number of people who would like to say goodbye.
Surprisingly that didn’t hit me as a sad thing, more “crap I have a lot to do in two days”.
I’m not even sure when I’m seeing who and what.
Trying to get everyone in and still be totally ready. Planning it out in my head
And passing out.
First real post back in a while and possibly the last.
To start, today was loads of fun.
Delicious sushi, odd thrift purchases (owl statue, two beerstein-esque shot glasses, book on man manners or something), port adventures, awesome gifts, and not really saying goodbye.
Check facebook message, I have a few things to ask of you.
Next, classes.
Traditions in Conversation (apparently a course everyone has to take, where they take about Augustine or something, I’m too tired to remember)
Basic Chinese I (doodle, you’ll be helping me A LOT).
The Literary Experience (I haven’t read up on this yet, but it sounds incredibly boring).
Differential Equations with Linear Algerbra (not the math course I wanted, but whatever, I’m going to take them all at some point…)
International Relations (could be interesting, could just be a boring intro course).
Mostly afternoon classes, which actually annoys me, I’d rather be done early, take a break, and do my work.
Then there’s other activities.
I don’t know what I want to do at college yet.
I have work study, so I have to figure that out on my first day of orientation (that’s when in do it, I’m not just being lazy), then I want to do some sort of community service or club.
My main goal is to stay busy and get myself into a fuller schedule, to try and stray from the too laid back life I’ve had. I’m not bringing a tv or video games or any of that, hoping to keep away from needless distractions and get focused on actually doing things.
Guitar is coming though.
My hope is my lfe consists of classes/work, “job”, religion/volunteering, club (still up in the air), music (hence my guitar), and staying active in some way (club sport or longboarding if max actually gives me one).
I want this to be my second chance to do more. I’m not blaming my friends for the fact that I feel this new for a second chance, but I, for now, don’t care about “making friends”, in hopes that I figure out a good balance of the things mentioned above and meet people through those (probably people very different from the friends I have now).
I’ve never been a party kid anyways. I mean, I’m sure I’ll go to some, but I kind of want my social interactions to be based around doing things, instead of people I just live with and see a lot and all we ever do is bum around and go to class.
See, as much as I’ve loved my life here and love my friends, I do look back on all the wasted time and wish that maybe I did things different.
Anyways, all I know about my last days are a family dinner tomorrow, hanging with D E and MK the next night or two, stopping by my dads to say goodbye, packing, and saying goodbye to everyone.
Tomorrow scattered amongst family obligations I need to sit and go through all the school stuff I can, and get started on all the things I still need to do. Then, if there’s time, read.
Sorry if this is really long, but it might be the last, so deal :]
In case it is, thank you tumblr, thank you for listening to me whine, for helping me think and grow, for bringing me close to Doodle and MK (who as much as they hate me an I hate them and they hate each other, aretwo of the most wonderful people I’ve met), and for more things I can’t think of because I’m tired (how many times have I given you that excuse???).
I feel guilty, because today is the last day I’m technically with my dad, but instead I’m going with the crew in the RV to Jones Beach and hanging out.
I feel bad, but lately my dad and I are just…distant.
It’s sad, I guess, but I’m definitely going to stop by his house and say goodbye before I leave, but this whole divorced parent thing makes leaving a bigger deal than it should be.
We make the sun shine, we make come on Move with me. Move with me. Move with me. Move with me.
Don’t you think I could tell that you were trying to, trying to Make a fool out of me. a fool out of me. Don’t you think I could tell that you were trying to, trying to Make a fool out of me. a fool out of me.
To remember who you really are.
It’s so easy to get lost in constantly having to present whatever face you believe a person wants to see rather than your own.
Yet we hesitate to surrender all of our insecurities Move with me. Move with me. Only the ones we are most comfortable relinquishing Move with me. Move with me.
Don’t you think I could tell that you were trying to, trying to Make a fool out of me. a fool out of me. Don’t you think I could tell that you were trying to, trying to Make a fool out of me. a fool out of me.
And I know I’m not the one who is habitually optimistic
But I’m the one who’s got the microphone here so just remember this
Yeah, well life is about love, lost minutes and lost evening
About fire in our bellies and about furtive little feelings
And the aching amplitudes that set our needles all a-flickering
And they help us with remembering that the only thing that’s left to do is live
- “I Knew Prufrock Before He Got Famous” - Frank Turner
Just got back from breakfast with MK, Devin, and Eric. I think I lost my car keys either at the place in Smithtown or (hopefully) they’re at my cousin’s house. Regardless, I have to find a house key to their house, my spare key, and bike over there, since my house is empty.
Then later meeting up with those three to go to the beach and relax.
